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Well I’ve tried ChristianMingle, OkCupid, and EHarmony. These are my personal experiences so take all of it with a grain of salt. Also my situation is that I live in a large city but is still pretty conservative and am female looking mostly for men. With that:
ChristianMingle: NOPE!! After chatting with a few people on there and reading profiles I decided it wasn’t for me due to the demographics. I’m moderately liberal and at least where I’m at all there was are VERY conservative Southern Baptists and evangelicals. Nothing against but I don’t want to date em. If I remember correctly they have a celibate option so… a possibility?
OkCupid: It does have an option! However, it being both free and pretty easy to access everyone profiles, you get both alot of “You’ll like sex with ME” and just general weirdness. I personally joined more for the quizs.
EHarmony: Ok here’s were I really have mixed feelings. On the plus side, it is a GREAT site. Easy to navigate, real people, and I really like the led introduction. HOWEVER and these are pretty big, you can only chose one gender to date and while it does try to match you based on compatibility I do think it bases these on a very strict norm. This is a huge problem as you can only see people who are matched with you but you don’t know what on unless they choose to take more quizzes. The initial match quiz is hidden. So while it asks things like “how important is frequent sex to you” you don’t know what weight that question was given when marching you with someone.
In addition to retake that initial test, you have to get it authorized. There is no easy way to just retake. Something I need to do after going on a few dates and now knowing myself better and how the test is used. I hate how it assumes we are static, needs and preferences change!Long reply but it has been on my mind. I realize I should just get a blog so I can ramble on.
Hi Lore
It’s just because the individuals themselves don’t like talking so much directly to each other.
This is what I wrote on the 29th of November on this thread in response to Aristide, which seemed to have sparked a whole lot of new people into this conversation –
“Hi Aristide, thank you for your great input. I message a number of people frequently, and keep trying to instigate conversations, and get some messages back a few times and have made a Facebook friend – I know some of you may message people, but if all of the people in this group actually took action and kept approaching and kept talking to people and asking them questions and was interactive, rather than reactive, then maybe this would be titled a different thread. It’s ironic that this thread is a conversation (talk), that has been going on for quite some time, about the fact nobody talks here. It’s strange how a person can be in this group, yet, in private messaging, does not want to talk, but expected me to. Anyway, everybody is different and not everyone will like me pointing this out. In an asexual Facebook group someone recently said they had joined it because they thought there was going to be discussion – so what didn’t they start one? If there is a problem, it’s up to us to try to fix it, by taking action and hope that others will do the same.”
So I hope that gives you some insight Lore, into the problem why people don’t talk her – I have been on this site for a year and a half.
Sandra
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