WHO HERE IS ACTUALLY LOOKING FOR A SERIOUS AND COMMITTED NO SEX RELATIONSHIP?

[Sandra]

Happy Christmas and Happy Acemas everyone xxxxxxxx

[Sandra]

Off topic – Happy New Year for in a few hours.

How are you seeing the new year in?

Sandra

[Sandra]

Hi everyone

If you live in the UK, just to let you know, the next Asexual meet-up in my city of Exeter is on Sat 3rd of February – time and details is TBA at the moment as I am waiting for those travelling and staying in hotels to get back to me regarding arrival times and may be meeting with those the next day on Sunday 4th – so it could be a two-day meet weekend. So far 6 are due to attend with another person hoping to be off work that day now the date is officially set, I am hoping to get more.

If you don’t live in the UK but visiting, you can come too.

Let me know if you want to come, you can message me on here, or on http://www.facebook.com/acexualise.

Sandra

[Amanda]

I want to be. And I am still “in the closet” for lack of a better term. I do not know any asexual females from my area either. I can’t seem to find. Place to start.

[Sandra]

Hi Amanda

It is tough. Try to find a local meet-up in your area or join one of my FB dating groups if you are on Facebook to try to find someone in your area. I have two depending on what orientation you are http://www.facebook.com/groups/acexualisedating for asexuals who never want sex or https://www.facebook.com/groups/greyacexualdatinganddemiacexualdating for Grey Asexuals and demi-sexuals – so some will want sex.

Sandra

[Sandra]

Anyone else experienced this?

Why do people say they are lonely on here and then stop messaging when you thought you were getting along well and you offered to be at least be a good friend?

[Anonymous]

I think loneliness can become a prison, and the individual is fixated on looking for a certain kind of person (aka the key) to break them free of it.

I was guilty of this in my earlier years.

[Sandra]

Hi Druid

Yeah, I get that, they were interested in me romantically but I could not meet up at new year as I had other plans and they were alone at xmas and sounded lonely from the tone of their message, but if they are THAT lonely – why message and then not, then start messaging again and then not reply when I message them back? I did not know they were lonely when I first started talking to them, but I invited him to our next ace meet-up, but no reply! If I was that lonely and wanted to meet other aces, I would at least message back or even go to make friends – he is looking for a best friend and that may be his future partner. They said they wanted to meet me in the future in the spring (which I offered to do before xmas providing we Skyped first), but when I messaged about coming to the meet next month – no answer. Oh well, never mind. Plenty more fish in the asexy sea as it were.

[Anonymous]

Hello Druid,
I am not sure whether I understood properly what you say. You say that solitude is like a prison and the prisoner can become “obsessed” (negative word for a negative attitude, I guess) in finding the “key” for freedom from solitude, that is, the right “kind” of person. You say also that you were “guilty” of it in the early years of your life.
So, I interpret what you say in this way: you do not question that solitude is a prison, you question to be stuck (obsessed, fixed) to a certain kind (type or model) of person. Is it correct? If it is, do you imply that now you are still hoping to escape from solitude but that now you are more open to different kinds or types of people?

[Anonymous]

Hello Fanco

To correct you there, I used the words ‘loneliness’ and ‘fixated’, not ‘solitude’ and ‘obsessed’. These words have different meanings.

[Anonymous]

Solitude is situational, while loneliness is psychological/emotional.

I myself am in solitude, yet I do not feel loneliness.

Not everyone who experiences loneliness is obsessed, and hence why I used the word fixated. An obsession is an intense preoccupation, while fixated would be a set expectation.

That said, I don’t think everyone who is lonely is necessarily fixated either.

[Anonymous]

ok…

[Sasa]

I too have been married, divorced, have children, am recently enlightened on the asexual spectrum, and am hopeful that a loving, monogamous, platonic yet romantic and committed relationship awaits me on this journey.

[Sandra]

Hi Sasa

Good, I am glad to hear you are positive. I am monogamous too, although I keep meeting a fair few aces online who are Poly, not so much on this site though.

I have my next asexual in person meet-up this weekend coming and I am so looking forward to that!

Sandra

[Simon Pugh]

Me

[Sandra]

Hi Simon

That is great.

I noticed you live in the UK, I am having an asexual meet-up this weekend – Starts on Saturday at 12.30pm at the Chevalier Inn, at the top of Fore Street in Exeter. We are going to the museum after we have eaten lunch there and then food and chat after. For the people staying in hotels, or who could not make it on Sat,or just ant to attend, we are having another meet the next day. If you want to join us, you would be welcome.

Sandra

[Anonymous]

Me.

[Sandra]

Hi Joy,

I love your new profile name – Unicorn Heart!!

[Anonymous]

Hi, Sandra! I had deleted my original account when Carl and I got together. *sigh*

[Sandra]

Ahhh bless, well I love your new username – it really suits you! You’re magic.

How are you celebrating being single tomorrow?

[Author]

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