WHO HERE IS ACTUALLY LOOKING FOR A SERIOUS AND COMMITTED NO SEX RELATIONSHIP?

[Sandra]

Hi All

It has come to my attention that a lot of aces in general do not seem that bothered to actually be in a relationship with another asexual and more are looking for friendship on this site. I am a heteroromantic.

I have a lot of younger sexual guys foreign guys interested in me all the time but not so much asexual – it seems there is no asexual foreign guy who actually wants to form a strong emotional connection and message lots, be in contact etc – I love that connection!!

Is there anyone on here who is actually actively seeking a relationship and making an effort to get to know others for that reason or are you passively waiting for it to ‘just happen’?

What has been your experience?

I recently set up an Asexualise Dating group on Facebook exclusively for asexuals only, who want a forever relationship without sex. http://www.facebook.com/groups/acexualisedating This is because I was fed up with ace dating groups having sexuals lurking in them and people not actually wanting a relationship and I want to find true love with another ace guy.

• This topic was modified 8 years, 1 month ago by Sandra.

[Ronald Sims]

I will actually be interested in relationship without sex. I often had to compromise with sexual people, but they were reasonable (touching, cuddling and the like w/out sex) I will check out your group 🙂

[Rachel Harrington]

I am even though dating scares me (but only way to get over the fear is to get out there I guess)

[Sandra]

Absolutely Rachel – more power to you.

[Marlies]

I am looking for a real connection but not sure if it is going to happen.

[Christina Mikkelsen]

I’m open to the idea but won’t be easy when there´s only like 2 women from Denmark active on here other than myself 🙂

[Amy Fowler]

I am very serious in my search but as Christina Mikkelsen says, not a lot of Danes here….:-(

• This reply was modified 8 years ago by Amy Fowler.

[Sandra]

Yeah, it is really tough. I am a heteroromantic and get attracted mostly to foreign guys and there are hardly any heteroromantic foreign aces in the UK – most are homoromantic.

I love my home so not prepared to move but would comment to see someone in the UK – if for example they lived in London or nearby to my home.

Would either of you – Amy or Christina – be prepared to move?

I noticed it’s mostly girls her saying they want a serious relationship – does it mean most guys are not – I wonder?

[Amy Fowler]

I think all of us heteroromantic women realize just how few guys you find here. My theory is that men in general (sorry for generalizing) are less interested in relationships. They may therefore simply be happy just hanging around with various friends and not have a partner? “relationship is the price that men pay for sex and sex the price women pay for a relationship” may have a bit of truth in it – even on an ACE webpage??? Anyone with a Y chromosome who have an opinion about this?

[Sandra]

Hi Amy

I get your point. It’s such a shame. Ironically I do tend to meet aromatics who are looking for a platonic relationship. I am too romantic for them.

There are a couple of guys from on this site that come to my ace meet-ups, which is really nice, but I am not relationship compatible with either of them, only friendship or meet-upship.

[Anonymous]

I’m personally looking for a hetero romantic relationship, but I also happen to want children. What a problematic situation.

[Anonymous]

Hen’s teeth.

[Sandra]

Hi Aristide

There are still female asexuals who will have sex for conception purposes – in fact a fair number of asexual guys want that too – which I definitely don’t and makes it harder.

You could also adopt or have artificial insemination – or some people already have kids if you don’t mind that.

Thanks for sharing
Sandra

[Matt Dalonzo]

Is there a Semi-Sexual category? Like a once or twice a year thing. I’m an asexual, but I think about it-and talk about it-just don’t do it.

[Sandra]

Hi Matt Dalonzo

This is the group you would be looking for –

https://www.asexualitic.com/groups/gray-aces/

Demi-sexual and semi-sexual are in that group. Be sure to let the people know, who you want to date, of your preferences.

Asexuality is the lack of sexual attraction toward a specific person. If you feel it sometimes but only under specific circumstances, then that would usually fall under the demi-sexual/Grey A group. If you feel it a lot but just decide not to participate through choice or lack of people to do that with, that would indicate you were sexual rather than asexual. As an asexual who does not experience sexual attraction at all – I never think about having sex with anyone.

Be sure to mention your preferences to any potential partner for understanding and compatibility.

Sandra

[Ilu V’m Piche]

meeeeee! Problem is, I’m always meeting people who are looking for something platonic instead. ACTUAL romantic relationship, por favor!

I’ve been in relationships with sexuals where I’ve compromised for them… and while I’m not exactly against double MY that, I really would prefer NOT TO. Like ever, at all.

[Sandra]

Hiya

Yeah, I am a heteroromantic and know how you feel. I love romance and kissing but I find I attract the highly sexual guys (which I refused to date) and become friends with ace guys who aren’t that bothered.

It’s such a shame because a lot of ace guys say they are lonely and want a partner – but the heteroromantics aren’t that proactive and the aromatics – well, we are not suitable because I like romance and kissing – but they do want to talk more unless I am into them romantically – then it’s no go.

Sandra

[Annika]

Me too. I’m new to this asexuality thing, kind of just discovered it and it realised that wow, that’s me, so I’m not weird! Great! I’ve been married before, divorced now and I have kids, so I’m not totally and completely alone, but I do miss the romance and the loneliest times are the evenings when the kids are asleep and it’s just me.
But I haven’t given up hope, although there’s only like 1% of the population who are asexuals, still, in a world with 7 billion people, 1% isn’t that bad. (or well, 0.5% if half are men, half women)

[Omar Haddad]

Me! I also want kids! Why should this be considered weird? I think it is healthy to really know what you want from a relationship and seek your true happiness. In fact, I believe asexuals are superior in that matter! They open minded, really know what they want, and most importantly, are not ashamed of not matching the social standards. I mean at least that’s the way I feel… By the way, what happens in my bedroom is nobody’s business other than mine and my partner’s!

It can be very hard to find the right person. Especially when your to connected to where you live. But I’d like to hope that one day this right person will show up 🙂 It’s a huge challenge that can result higher happiness… So don’t give up!

[Sandra]

Hi Omar

Thank you.

Yeah, I adore where I live and so would be other half like to live in my city – I live 5 minutes walk from the beautiful quayside, 5 minutes walk to my local town and train station and 20 minutes into the city. My flat is gorgeous – but only suitable for one person and I enjoy living on my own anyway as I am an individualist and like us to both be responsible for ourselves.

If you have nay suitable ace romantic guy friends, let me know.

Sandra

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