[Tommi]

Most of America idealize the idea of being married with two kids in a white picket fence. As for me not so much but I’m curious what would be everyone here ideal living situation/dream life?

[Anonymous]

My ideal life would be with a partner who I could be completely comfortable around and who would help me build a tiny house for us on a beautiful piece of land. I’d love to own a dog and spend my life travelling and seeing the world. So a simple life, but an interesting one. 🙂
What about you?

[Tommi]

Wow a lot of people have put down to travel the world so do I eventually. I want a small house as well maybe even just an apartment but I want some land maybe at most an acre. I wanted to grow my own food and have chickens xD Instead of kids I would have like five dogs! I also would like a partner(s) who shares in my beliefs and interests like for example me being a househusband while they are the breadwinner should never be an issue. I might consider moving outside the US but again I’d have to be madly in love and have a plan for how that would go down. basically a comfortable life and love 🙂

[Christina Nicole]

My ideal life would be one without many restrictions. It would be a life lived like a tumble weed, going whichever the wind blows. It would be a life where I travel the world constantly, hopping from one place to the next, doing something without too many strings attached (perhaps, teaching English as a second language, since it is something I could do anywhere) to make a little bit of money to be able to live and keep wandering, keep drifting. In my ideal life, there are no children or minivans or white picket fences, in fact, I would prefer there to be no fences at all. I would never have to worry about being raped again, because I would travel with a companion, a companion who would be my best friend, and would never, ever expect sex from me and a well trained cat with paperwork and vaccinations to go anywhere. I want a life of excitement and adventure, outside the norms, filled with camel treks and safaris, foreign markets, caressing wild animals, exotic cuisine, new cultures, touching lives, and having others touch mine, and above all, getting lost….getting lost all the time. Perhaps when I am old I will slow down, and I’ll tell all the neighborhood kids about all my adventures, because I’ll the the real life, female equivalent of Indiana Jones and bake cookies, in between my travels.

• This reply was modified 10 years, 6 months ago by Christina Nicole.

[Mark]

I’m not as adventurous as the other people here. I don’t really like traveling. I have problems with anxiety that I won’t really get into right now. Going on an expensive trip sounds too luxurious. I would rather enjoy the beauty of the community in which I currently live. As for families, I don’t really agree that just because someone is unmarried and childfree means they don’t want to start families. I’m not going to have children, but I have relatives, friends and pets. That’s like a family to me. If I had a girlfriend, I’m sure I would think of her as being part of my family. My goals are to make more friends because I’m lonely. I also need to work more on my relationship with God because I live according to John 3:30 — “He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less.”

[Anonymous]

I’ve thought about it a lot and I’ve decided to win the lottery. It pretty much solves everything. So now it’s just a matter of choosing the right lottery for me. Do I want to win something like Powerball or MegaMillions and end up on the news and lose all of my privacy? Or do I want to slip in there like a sly little fox and win one of those less prominent lotteries like “Hot Lotto”?

So many choices when planning my future millionaire-dom. And then there’s investments. There is still a bond bubble in the U.S., so do I go the route of blue-chip income stocks? I also read that dividends are now being taxed as income. Sheesh, planning on being filthy rich is actually really stressful.

No actually…my ideal life would be freedom. Freedom to travel. Freedom to work on my art. Freedom to experience the things I’m curious about.

So it really doesn’t have to be the lottery. Some sick magic abilities would also be an option. 🙂 I’m currently working on telekinesis—it’s not go so well, though, I have to admit…

[Jessica Sutton]

I dream of being out west in a cabin nestled in the country but a half our drive from civilization. I want to be a Photography professor where I can inspire people ; I would like to have a partner who is supportive and strives to inspire as well. Though I do see having pets in the household.
However I also want to be actively apart of my community and have the leisure to travel and do as I please because I know this life is very short and I want to enjoy every second of it by seeing it’s beauty ( which due to how life actually is I am very behind lol).
I also think my ideal in life is to be a successful professional before I teach people to be professional.
Though I should stop yammering or I will start talking about even tinier details.
😀

[Emily]

I just want to be comfortable and happy! That’s not very specific, but I think I’m just easy to please in that regard. I’d be happy in a small house or apartment, and I would love love love to live in either New England or California, but that’s not a requirement. Though, I will say, I’ve only been to California once (San Diego) and I adored it as much on that brief trip as I always thought I would! Possibly a pet or two because I do love cats and dogs. I have a few pets myself and I’m always getting paid by my aunt and uncle to pet-sit when they go on vacations. Pets are the best!

Romantically, I’d be with a man who’s my best friend and more all wrapped up in one. We’d be comfortable together and want the same things out of our relationship (no sex, no kids, just us :P). We’d always motivate, support, and understand each other… and have fun and laugh while doing it! I think that’d be perfect.

Just a normal every day life.

[Violet]

I’d like to go on adventures far and wide with like-minded best friends. From traveling, to playing games, festivals, and restaurant hunting. I’d like to live in a different country. I don’t know where I’d live though. I want to live luxuriously – like I want a manservant/butler. I’d like a pet but something different. Like a silkie or some super fluffy creature.

If I found a significant other I would prefer to live in separate but nearby houses. Or a really big house split down the middle. I like my space. But I highly doubt I’ll find a hot guy that doesn’t like sex/want kids that I get along with, so it’s not really a life expectation.

[Raell5]

Awesome! I’m actually living or have lived all/most of the lives you described. And you’re right..it IS fun.
I’ve taught English in Mexico and five different places in Thailand, been a university prof in Kentucky, traveled the world, lived in luxury with servants, on a farm where I grew my own organic food, and currently living in an apartment a few minutes from the beach, on the Songkhla peninsula in southern Thailand, near the Malaysia border.
I live very small now, drive a motorbike or take cheap public transportation, don’t even have a kitchen because I buy fresh produce from the street vendors every day.
Because I was mugged near a remote beach by a hidden assailant, I now wish I had someone to wander and travel with me.
When I lived on my family farm I had many pets-llama, dogs, parrots I hand-raised, horses, a mule, etc. Now I’m petless because I live in an apartment.But I DO have Netflix and huge flat screen TV.
I moved here to do extreme bird photography and teaching gives me a work permit to stay here. Extreme: I go into jungles and swamps, climb cliffs and mountains to get photos of birds in the wild
Green Bee-Eater, Lamnarai, Thailand http://t.co/i406Zncx0T
I go to the beach almost every day
Body-surfing waves at Samilan Beach, Songkhla, Thailand http://twitpic.com/e36ha2
If you have a college degree you can get a job teaching English overseas.

[Lenka]

In my dreamworld I would like to live in my own house or flat, situated near my partner´s house or flat. I´m not a big fan of living together because it brings constant silly arguments about the color of carpets and type of the furniture etc.
I need to have animals in my life, so no traveling to far countires for a long time. I´m also socially anxious around people, I don´t enjoy meeting new people and different cultures.

Now the reality comes:
My life is so messed up that I need some stability and finally have a calm and simple life. I will probably never be able to have a normal job due to my poor education, mental illness and problems with unemloyment in my country, so I would make a compromise and live together with someone who wouldn´t mind a loving “golddiger” who would take care of the house, while he would be at work.

[Sandra]

Hiya, my ideal life would be to be with a guy who is my soulmate, best friend and love of my life all wrapped into one. He would be my life partner in a serious and committed, Living Apart Together relationship, without ever having sex, kids or marriage. I would like them to live either near me or next to me, but not in the same house as me. I love living on my own and can’t get much sleep with someone sleeping in the same bed as me, which is no good to me.

The said guy would be foreign, with short brown hair, slightly toned on the arms, but predominantly thin and clean shaven, between the age of 21-27. Someone with shared interests and passions and who 100% and much more, supports me in my career. He would be a kind, sensitive, soft and gentle guy, who is dedicated and besotted with me and my quirky personality, but who gives me the freedom to see my male friends and supports me living my unconventional, young and quirky independent life. He would love passionate kissing and making love with the tongue and get naturally excited, he would love holding hands, including in public and some kissing in public too. He would love embracing and some sensuality, such as stroking arms, hands, face, head and hair. He would be poetic, romantic, affectionate and deeply emotionally connected to me, in a way like no one else.

He would love pets (guineapigs – as I have 3) Would not be into sport or travel, but love zoos, aquariums, theme parks and dance/club music, going to the movies to watch similar types of films to me – Acrtion/ Thriller, Disney/Pixar and like going on holiday in the UK to London, or on Eurostar to Disneyland Paris – I don’t like flying and he would be happy with that and not feel the need to go abroad, other than to see his family – On his own if meant flying. Ideally he would live in the UK or move over here to live near me. If he lived in the EU, but moved over here to live with me, ideally we would visit his family by Eurostar. He would be happy to cook for me and wouldn’t mind housework – I don’t like either.

He would be there for me no matter what.

He would encourage me in my career and we would have a very loving, open and honest relationship with just each other and be totally loyal, only wanting a relationship of that type with one another (monogamous). We would be able to talk to each other about everything and anything, with no fear, and be completely comfortable around and with each other, always. We would be the female and male equivalent of each other, loved up and in a teenage style relationship, having the time of our lives and living it to the max. He would be different, interesting, quirky and fun, just like me. We would both have huge hearts for each other and bring out the best of each other.

I think I am due a profile update and that I will use this to freshen things up – Thanks for making me think about exactly what I want Tommi.

[Raell5]

Well, if you know what you want, you’ll know when you find it!

[Anonymous]

I just want a unicorn 😕

[Sandra]

Hi Raell5 – I think I have more chance of finding a needle in a haystack, but there is always a chance.

[Raell5]

I decided that nobody in this forum has enough drive to date anyone, so I started frequenting a TCK..Third Culture Kids..website for people who spent part of their childhood in countries other than their passport homes.
http://tckid.com/what-is-a-tck.html

Strangely, even though there is a dating forum, they display the same behavior seen on this forum..people tell stories of being unable to connect romantically, feelings of depression, isolation, not fitting in, only wanting to travel and learn new things, to move every two years, never wanting to settle down. Most seemed never to have had successful relationships, and many said they need a calm “rock” personality companion to calm them down.

I’m already discouraged. I can’t even detect any flirting! Oh, well. Not that I know how to flirt, so I can’t talk.

[Ani]

Raell5, is that a dating site for people who are expats or were expats once basically? I don’t know why but I always hoped that my future girlfriend would be foreign. Now choice enough in Brussels, we are full of expats due to EU buildings and institutions of NATO, but still it’s not as easy to date foreigners as it is to meet them. Some expat circles are relatively closed… Especially the non-EU expats, which is a pity as I adore the Middle East and we have a large Turkish and Arabic community. But it’s not as easy to come close to any of those girls…

My ideal life would involve traveling the world and frequent relocations too. I have lived in 6 foreign countries and like to navigate in the expat circles ; I need some change of scenery now and then in order to not suffocate. However, if the future Mrs Ani prefers not to relocate, then I’m OK with that.

The ideal day to day life to me centers around art. I would love to keep writing and performing poetry, and maybe to be involved in an arts collective. Arts is something I am too passionate about to give up.

The ideal future girlfriend would be very openminded towards minorities (I have Asperger) and preferably very fascinated by other cultures and traveling. It’s not a “must” though. She ideally is deeply into arts, preferably into creating arts herself too. It doesn’t matter if it’s painting, drawing, music creation, writing, … But some passion for art would be lovely. She ideally is deeply romantic and loves intimate moments such as falling asleep and waking up in each other’s arms. I don’t find sex a necessary thing but I do need some intimacy in a relationship, just being close together would be needed for me. Ideally she, just like me, loves being together very frequently. I don’t want children, however I am not opposed to marriage at all. In a way co-dependancy is a beautiful thing, in my opinion.

[Raell5]

You could try the website link listed and just cruise around and check profiles, read what people have written. The nickname “Third Culture Kids” refers to people who spent at least part of their formative years somewhere other than the home country of their parents. Expats are people who are living abroad as adults, but for TCKs, they are often both since they are restless, wanting to travel often (like I do).
I have already talked to TCKs from other countries on that website, but like I said, they don’t seem particularly aggressive about finding a mate. Most seem to have given up on romance after repeated failures to relate to love interests, but there are other Facebook websites for TCKs that seem more romantically inclined, if you google “TCK Facebook” sites. I suppose one has to try many doors to find an ideal companion.

I want to be understood, to have someone as playful, curious, and adventurous as I am, someone intelligent enough to know how to discuss books, art, music, physics, astronomy, etc, but mostly I just want a stable person with demisexual tendencies. I’ve actually had that sort of romantic partner many times, but it never worked out, as I lack the female brain chip to manage males..just be their pals.

[Ani]

I wouldn’t really classify as a TCK, I left my home country at age 22 and returned only 8 years later. I did spend those 8 years shattered across 6 countries and travelled in some more countries, so I have a lot of expat experience. I’m not sure though if that would make me welcome at a TCK website, even though I can relate to the restlessness, the desire to change scenery often.

[Raell5]

Many of the TCKs said they didn’t necessarily want a companion who is a TCK, but someone who stable, a “rock,” who would love to join them in their restless travels.

You can google other TCK websites, including https://www.facebook.com/pages/Third-Culture-Kids-TCKs/274710935889196 Facebook page, and a TCK dating website; http://tckdating.wordpress.com/ but when I went on these sites, it was almost like this one..many people talking and describing their “ideal” partner but no visible courting action, but there could have been private messaging going on. I only saw hetero romantic comments, but that doesn’t mean anything.

As a male, you are expected to pursue relationships so it shouldn’t matter. A hetero female is expected to wait until someone shows interest. I have found that showing any interest in a male will put him off. When I’m in my male mode, I’m the same way-aggressive females make me back away in confusion.

Since I’m equally male and female, with no initial attraction to either, I usually just cave in if a male pursues me relentlessly enough, ignoring my repeated rejections. As in nature, this means the ones who win me over have high testosterone levels. Then they expect ME to act like a typical female, which I don’t, so though we have tons of fun it hasn’t yet worked long-term.

[Author]

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