I look like a heteosexual male but…

This topic contains 2 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  Mystique 8 months, 2 weeks ago.

Viewing 3 posts - 1 through 3 (of 3 total)
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  • #30824

    Mystique
    Participant

    I took to the shuttle to the airport. While in my seat I attempted to buckle up. “What’s wrong with this thing.” I was thinking in head. The buckle wasn’t working – I tried and tried and tried to buckle up but it just wouldn’t work. It was early morning and still dark outside so I could see the buckle but I could feel it. Hmm… it feels the same, as the others, so I tried it again, still no joy. Then I reach further behind my back and found another buckle, whoosh!! What a relief it worked this time.

    The appearance of the buckles was the same on the outside but on the inside they were completely different. I realized how similar that was to me. From the outside I look like a normal man, I act like a normal man, and I speak like a normal man (sometimes with a high pitch voice, though). I’m muscular, my head in bald, I wear a goatee and for all intensive purposes I looked like a masculine man on the outside. But on the inside I didn’t fit the heterosexual male model. My body is completely oblivious for the need for sex.

    Therefore, I believe that as an asexual male I am a “walking contradiction” but I’m all right with that. However, to be fair I must find a way to make my female associations who are gender binary aware to them the perceptive flaw that hangs within me. I must develop a mission statement, or script of some sort or an argument to support my condition to let everyone know who I really am.

    If you can relate or understand my dilemma – let me know.

    #30827

    Kat InLosAngeles
    Participant

    Aa a woman, I would really appreciate just a casual statement like “I’m not really into sex”, especially made early on like in the first, second, third date. Or from a co-worker, whatever. Or “I’ve always had a really low sex drive”. Certainly good friends could get a more detailed explanation of asexuality etc., but casually throwing it out there like it’s no big deal would be welcome.

    #30830

    Mystique
    Participant

    I see your point, Kat. A simple approach would be better. Eventually, it will come to that. First, I believe we must have a sure handle on who we are. Next, we have to clearly explain the statement “I’m not really in sex”. Just think about the various meanings that statement can hold. If you say that to me an asexual I can feel ya because I’m right there.
    However, if you say that to a straight person – they’d most let likely ask you – What do you mean by that? And the beat goes on.

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