April 9, 2020 at 6:10 pm #31688VeevieSpectator
Hi everyone! I’m 33 years old and after a few months of on / off research I officially identified as ace on 29th March. I mentioned it to my old uni friends in a WhatsApp group last week and I was surprised how I suddenly started shaking and my heart was beating so fast. I didn’t think it was a big deal for me as other people’s sexuality has never been a big deal to me but I discovered how difficult it can be. One friend if I was diagnosed by a doctor which stung but she’s just not very ‘woke’ and just needs a bit of education.
I told another friend over the phone and she’s crazy liberal so she was perfect to speak to. I had told her last summer that I suspected that I was but hadn’t looked into it yet so it wasn’t a massive surprise or jump for me.
The person I tell everything to before anyone is my sister, my best friend but she’s been struggling with isolation so she’s not someone I can tell right now because need her to really listen. My sister is actually the one who suggested that I could be asexual after I admitted to her (and myself!) that I don’t like sex. I’ve ordered a flag, black ring, some ace badges and some paints with the asexual flag. I plan to come out in a loud and funny way as you only get one chance to do it.
How about everyone else?May 10, 2020 at 7:45 am #31781AbbySpectator
For me, I think I just kind of got to a point where I didn’t really think it was that big of a deal. I kind of knew I was after some research about it and even just understanding the concept went a long way towards helping me feel like less of a freak in a world of young people wanting to mess around. I felt wayyy better about myself when I was able to say “this is what I am,” and it didn’t feel that crazy.
I think the first person I told was my roommate when I was still attending college. She didn’t really care and thought the story of my first time having sex (a very awkward experience btw for someone who didn’t want to be there in the first place) was hilarious. When I told my siblings they basically already knew. And when I told my dad they defended me when he called it a phase.
As far as a flashy coming out story, I think the closest I come to it is when I went to pride with my family and stuck an ace flag on my shirt, and my step-mom told me I was being disrespectful by pretending to be something I wasn’t. And when I told her I was ace, she promptly started talking about how asexuality wasn’t a real thing and it was just a word for people with low sex drives. Not my favorite moment with her.
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