Any other single parents out there?

[Whitney]

Hi all,

I realize this is probably a super small subgroup of Ace’s but any other single parents out there? I’m a single mom by choice to a wonderful almost 6 yr old boy. I choose to become a parent through adoption for lots of reasons, my asexuality being one of them. Just looking for any other friends who might be sharing a similar life journey!

Whitney

[Firefly]

I’m a single parent to two autistic children. Well, one’s almost thirty so not really a child anymore. The other is fifteen, almost sixteen. I was married to both fathers, and have remained good friends, but neither relationship worked because I just wasn’t ‘there’ sexually. I wouldn’t be without either of my children, even though it’s been hard. I remember what it was like to have a six year old. I’m so glad mine are older.

[Wendy]

Hi I’m Wendy and I’ve got two girls aged 15 and 16yrs. I only discovered I was asexual a few months ago. It only took me 50years to figure that out! It has helped to make sense of my experiences and relationships. There are so many events and so often they were traumatic for me. I don’t know where I go from here but I know I need friendship and ideally would hope before I pop off this mortal coil that I could fall in love with someone who could love me. I hope but know it is a tall order. I will be honest, as a single disbled asexual mum I feel incredibly lonely. Thank goodness for my best buddies – my dogs and cat. Always accommodating to lie at my side or let me hug them to bits. Guess I feel a bit low tonight…think I’ll go find a pooch and get a hug. 🙂

[Lyn]

I am a single mum to a daughter of 19 who is also on the autism spectrum having aspergers syndrome. I am incredibly happy I had her but have never been able to stay in heterosexual relationships for long as I have been put off by the sexual element it turns me off the other person fairly quickly. My daughter thinks choosing to be a single mum is a very selfish decision and having just one child even more so but that is just life and how it has panned out. With hindsight there are many things we would not do but that would mean a perfect world which is near impossible to achieve. So we make the best of the situations we find ourselves in and hope we make the right decisions. I never feel lonely as such and maybe that’s because my family have so much ASD in the form of aspergers we function quite well in our own company but seem to get along with and understand men more so than women. I am happy to have my daughter though and wouldn’t change a thing. I am still good friends with my former partners not that there are very many but they all say the same it was me that left them not them that left me but they don’t know it was about the sex at all. Which is sad as they were and are genuinely nice men it’s just me that changed as it ruined my view of them and feelings towards them.

[Firefly]

I’m right there with you, Wendy 😀 I, too took pretty much half a century to figure things out, and find myself at 52 a disabled single mother with two children and a houseful of animals 😀 I can’t say I’m lonely, though. It’s just that I would like someone to share my special moments, good and bad, with. My son and I are together 24/7 and I would like some adult company and someone to complain about him to

[Wendy]

Hi Firefly. Yeah I think life is often too hectic to consider being lonely. Sometimes it’s all I want. It’s also the oddest moments that I get almost ‘caught out’ and find myself thinking about it. Like standing alone in a crowd of people watching a fireworks display and the kids have vanished with pals.. I must admit that I am concerned about when the girls leave home. I’m making plans now to fill up my days with all the things that I’ve never been able to do because I was too busy looking after others. Funny old life eh :/ x

[Guylaine]

Iam a single mom of a soon to be 6 years old awesome boy. I have been single since my separation (now divorce) 4 years ago. Never heard of aces before a couple months ago when i read a post about it and realized i was normal. That i didn’t have to be alone because i was not into sex. I have to admit though that finding another ace for a serious relationship doesn’t seem that easy.

[Annika]

I’m a single mum too, 2 kids. I only recently discovered that this is where I belong, as I have been in so called ‘traditional’ heterosexual relationships before, but I don’t think I could do it anymore, I have to be honest to myself and just try my best to find a relationship in which I can be me. But I’m just glad that at least now I know who me is.

[Rhiannon]

Mother of three boys 13,11 and 7

[Author]

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