Alley Smith

@omalleycat active 4 years, 5 months ago


Looking for
About me
  • Things I am looking for in a person are:

    I’m looking for someone to laugh with, travel with, argue with, and show me a vision of the world I would not see alone. What that means? I have no idea.

    I’m not only seeking female companionship, but this site appears to only have one or the other as an option. You can be male, female, or a talking duck for all I care. Bring the smile to my eyes and you’re in.

    About me

    I’m obsessive, antisocial, and have maybe three friends. Well there are many on Facebook, but who really counts them as anything more than blinking avatars who occasionally say words when you find them at a party? In truth, I’m quite alone.

    I love saying words like ”BEES!” or ”BOOZE!”

    According to the few who know me, I excel at telling truths at the worst of times, and flirting goes right over my head. While I’m hardly a bundle of energy, my mind gets manic when I’m bored, which leaves me somewhat unable to focus on simple things.

    My favorite book is The Count of Monte Cristo because the subject of vengeance, transformation and self identity are fascinating. My favorite nostalgic band is Mindless Self Indulgence, but generally I’m a sucker for 80s pop/goth, and I bask in songs across the genres to a point that some find annoying. I’m not pleased until the earphones are at full blast, and I keep them blasting whenever I’m in a moving vehicle. It’s nothing personal, I just don’t care for conversation when I can see the town racing by to music.

    I laugh a lot. Like, a LOT. I laugh at Bojack Horseman, Archer, fail videos, my pets being pissed off, people being pissed off.. Hell, sometimes I laugh when I’m pissed off. Whether it’s a witty anecdote or a fart joke, chances are equal that I will laugh.

    Currently I’m in my fourth year of the BA program as a Criminology major, and though I did not intend this, I have collected nearly enough credits to minor in either Philosophy or Anthropology. I hope to work in either law enforcement or protection, but I often find myself doubting my ability to succeed in any career. I worry I’d get bored after the first case.

    In my spare time I love playing video games on my 360 (I know, it’s time to upgrade). I love Skyrim, Dragon Age, Bioshock, Alan Wake, Shadow Hearts (PS2), Singularity, Fear, and the Silent Hill series.

    I love horror movies. If it’s a black horror/comedy, even better. My favorite movies are Silence of the Lambs, Ginger Snaps, The Revenant, The Avengers, Scream, Donnie Darko, Snatch, Edward Scissorhands, and Rise of the Guardians.

    Guess I should add hobbies.. I write a lot, do terrible attempts at water painting when drunk, binge on Netflix, love music videos, and read lots of fanfiction. Because of my sensory overload issues, I’m very good at spot checking and observing various details upon first meeting people. So far it’s been completely useless, save for the odd moment where an undercover cop is failing horribly at his job. I’ve been trained in forensic fields such as entomology, anthropology, ballistics and.. Whatever else there is. I’m good at crime scene analysis, and it takes up a lot of my time when there’s nothing better to think about.

    If you’re interested, feel free to message me. I don’t care if you smoke, drink, do drugs, or are secretly a bronie. Far as I’m concerned, everyone has a vice; some are just more inclined to hide theirs. Not that being a bronie is a vice. No – you know what? It is.

    Guess the only thing left to do is click ”save changes”…

  • Name

    Alley Smith







    I am a


    Looking for a


    Marital status

    Prefer not to say






    Spiritual bu not religious


    Food & Wine

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