Who says NOT smart, funny and nice? It’s a given so moving on.  Oh wait, I want somebody to be fun and silly with.  Oh my god, that’s my ONLY must-have criteria?  Surely not.  This part is going to sound really brutal and ice-queen domineering, but I know what I don’t want. At this point in my life, I don’t have a list of acceptable criteria for a significant other (beyond stable, smart, funny and nice). If somebody doesn’t fit what I don’t want, I’d like to get to know them, however they are. I’m looking for somebody NOT needy, manipulative or a poser. I don’t want somebody who chooses a stereotype like ”nerd” to use those characteristics in lieu of a personality. I don’t want a guy who expects me to change but will make a space for me in his life and lets me do the same. A guy who knows that my choosing to be with him rather than needing to be with him is a compliment, not an insult.

I am heteromantic, love cuddling (unless it’s hot) and that’s as far as it goes.  I think a good mix of routine and spontaneity is important, about 70/30 (I realize that’s soul-crushingly high, but you have to factor in work). So I will drop reading/knitting/crocheting/gardening/biking/cloud watching/TV to go window shopping or see a daisy a few miles away. I love having just a running commentary on life (which is why window shopping is awesome; you get people watching AND see stupid crap). I play Final Fantasy, Shadow Hearts and Zelda type video games. I love Rumjacks, Pearl Jam, Flogging Molly, Dethklok, Smiths, Paul Simon and Bowie, I read Wodehouse, Christie, Dickens, John Connolly and Terry Pratchett. I fly kites, play frisbee catch, Scrabble, and mancala. I like people watching and long pointless discussions, the more random, the better. Not at all photogenic as evidenced by my profile pic and I don’t have a smartphone. I am the most cheerfully sarcastic nihilist-edged cynic you will ever meet. Ability for small talk is NONE. I sort of play the penny whistle and I love creating memories with the right person. I like dogs but prefer and have cats. Oh, and I collect lost keys and speak just enough Spanish to embarrass myself. I was/am a few classes short of my Masters in Counseling. My favorite thing about talking with homeless people is that they tend to treat me like a person.  You can also reach me at [email protected]