I thought of this because of something Raell5 asked – hopefully she’ll come here to restate her theory – but in short, it is that asexuals are unlikely to make that sort of move. Hopefully this thread will give us some insight!
On myself: Since the only romantic relationship situation I would consider is marriage, I go about things a little differently. I wouldn’t ‘ask someone out’ with the same meaning, but in order to get to know them more personally I would ask to do things with them. Then if things kept going along well I’d see where to go from there with a proposal. I’ve kind of always assumed that I’d be the one making the proposals, but who knows. 😉 I think it’d take me a while to get to that level but I honestly can’t say; I’ve never been close enough with anyone to feel that way about them (that I’d be interested in marrying them). Probably because I’ve always assumed everyone was sexual right off the bat (even if they didn’t show signs of it), I didn’t try to get to know them better. Time to change that outlook, I think. 🙂
Yeah, I’ve asked someone out before, but not after I hit puberty and realized some facts of life. I never allowed myself to pursue a sexual person after I started high school. It didn’t seem fair to them, and it’s rare for me to develop a romantic interest in general so it was no big deal.
As for asking another ace out? Sure, I have no problems being assertive in that regard if it’s for the right person. You can’t catch a fish if you don’t cast a line.
Funnily enough I’ve actually always been the one to make the first move. That said, I didn’t really figure out I was ace until a couple years back.
Regardless, I think I’d still ask someone out, even knowing that I’m ace. Since I prefer to get to know someone as a friend before I go out and hold their gross, sweaty palm, they’d definitely know I’m not a sexual person, so there wouldn’t be any confusion. Ideally. I dunno, people are complicated, even with communication.
Asexualitic.com is the first community and dating site for Asexual people. When major dating sites don't recognize our asexuality, we think that asexual people should have a place to meet and talk.
Create your Asexualitic.com profile to search and meet other aexuals, or build a platonic relationship.
Join the Asexual community and receive our e-mail newsletter